Don’t be deterred by my title. There’s nothing inappropriate about this post. Really. Just so you know, it’s all about bathrooms.
There are lots of public bathrooms on BYU campus. I mean, there’d have to be with 34,000 students.
Being a full-time student and part-time employee, I have many opportunities to visit these lovely facilities. Some of the loos are definitely nicer than others. That one in the Wilk is done astronaut style with EVERYTHING automatic. (That still freaks me out & I always miss the soap. Always.)
Not only do the bathrooms reflect the different architectural styles that cover BYU campus, they are full of fun and good times. For example, just the other day, I used a bathroom in the HFAC (which, by the way, for the longest time I thought was the HVAC, not the HFAC.), and I realized when I went to leave that the stall door had never locked. That could have been very potentially dangerous.
Another time, the door swung open after I had locked it. Also dangerous. These could have been devastatingly embarrassing events if someone else had been in the bathroom.
I’ve noticed too, that I tend to think of PSYCHO scenarios that could happen in the public bathroom. Like a lockdown. What the heck are you supposed to do if a gunman comes into the bathroom while you’re in a stall? No one teaches you that in elementary school when you’re learning fire drills, tornado drills, or earthquake drills.
Also, this week at BYU, 3 different Sanitary Napkin dispensers were broken into. All the money was stolen. That’s a crime, right there. Awesome. Bathroom crime.
Sometimes, there’s even notes about housing contracts on the back of the stall doors. Every time I see one of those, I wish it were a page of jokes. How much more fun would that be? It would pretty much be the bombiest thing I’ve seen in real life today!
And you know something that is awkward? When you run into the same person in the same bathroom a whole bunch of different times. How does that even happen? And what is the proper etiquette for that? Do you strike up a conversation? Get to know your new-found friend better? Ask them how they like the toilet paper?
And then there’s always the question of what-do-I-do-if-I-realize-too-late-the-stall-I-chose-is-out-of-tp. Bad news, right there.
Oh, the adventures of public lavatories.